Worth One Nickel
by X180
Summary: I let you in so many times, I forgot how to let you go. Tweek/BeBe angst. Why? Because I'm a loser; that's why. ONESHOT.


**I DO NOT OWN SOUTHPARK**

**Wow, it's been quite a while since I wrote poem-y angst. Ah well. I can't do this well. And after being so used to typing on a computer, it's very odd going back to writing on my iPhone. **

**Twebe (Tweek/BeBe) because its my Hetro OTP. I'm such a loser lol. I'm in love with an obscure fandom, with obscure characters, and an obscure pairing. **

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><p><strong>BEBE'S POV<strong>

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><p>You came here alone,<p>

Five cents to your name,

And nowhere to stay.

You begged and pleaded.

And I let you in, didn't I?

You slept on the cold basement floor,

Because you were convinced that it was what you deserved.

You ate next to nothing,

Because you felt you were weighing me down so much already.

You knocked on my bedroom door one night,

Saying you were scared,

And cold,

And lonely.

And I let you in, didn't I?

You said you felt safe just being near me.

You said you were content with sleeping on the shag rug.

But I didn't let you.

You slept on the warm bed with me that night.

Cocooned in warm blankets,

And cushioned by pillows.

I swear, I thought I seen you cry right then.

But I can't tell for sure.

We both woke up that morning warm,

We were wrapped in each other's arms for some odd reason.

And beyond the awkwardness with being so close, we were smiling

And safe,

And loved.

You slept with me every night after that.

I found myself entranced with you.

Don't ask me why, because looking back, I'm not so sure myself.

But I do remember loving your green eyes.

Perpetually fearful,

Filled with sadness and self-loathing,

But hypnotizing all the more.

You came with five cents to your name,

And bruises riddling every inch of your pearly skin,

Cuts scoring over your arms and legs,

Burns on your wrists and back,

A fractured rib you refused to tell me about.

You looked at me with blazing calm eyes and said, very softly,

"Please don't hurt me."

And I didn't, did I?

I let you in, didn't I?

I asked where you got such bad abuse from,

But you refused to tell me

You shook your head sadly and opted to sleep facing the wall instead of me.

I just sighed, hoping you'd tell me in the morning.

You did, too.

You woke up guilty, and told me his name.

It was Craig.

I was angry, and envious of him.

He hit you,

He cut you,

He broke you,

But you still loved him, huh?

You still talked about him like he was wonderful.

You loved his eyes, especially.

You said they were a beautiful midnight blue,

Intelligent and brooding,

And sometimes they'd flash and appear so much more brilliant.

Even when they flashed with anger.

You said eyes were the window to the soul, if only the one behind them would show you.

Well, I let you in, didn't I?

And you said you liked my eyes too,

That you could learn to love them,

Just like his.

You came here with five cents to your name,

And broken eyes,

Because no matter how much you stared at yourself in the mirror,

You couldn't find one beautiful thing.

And somehow you managed to see beauty in him.

I helped you.

I kissed every part of you that I found beautiful.

You laughed, too, because you're ticklish.

You hugged me and snuggled your nose into my neck,

And you returned the favor of kissing,

And I returned the favor of giggling along, because I was ticklish too.

Then the mood changed,

Like a storm rolling in suddenly,

And our breathing deepened.

Your eyes were no longer sorrowful,

But instead were clouded.

With want,

And need,

And all those things far too mature for stupid kids like us.

You looked at me and bowed down to kiss my cheek sweetly.

And you said,

"Do you want this?"

The want in your eyes were briefly displaced with concern and nervousness.

But I let you in, didn't I?

You came here with five cents to your name,

And a desire to make others happy.

You made me smile so much,

You told me what I wanted to hear,

You laughed and joked and shyly showed me affection.

You woke me every morning with brewing coffee,

And a small kiss.

You sent me off to sleep every night with protective arms wrapped around me,

Or a small quivering body to wrap my arms around.

Either way, we always managed to get a mouthful of our frizzy blonde hair before morning.

You made me feel truly happy,

And wanted,

And needed.

You were afraid and shocked to find me crying that one evening.

You weren't used to comforting me.

You looked at me in concern and didn't say much.

Only asked if I wanted to talk about it.

And I let you in, didn't I?

You came here with five cents to your name,

And a broken heart.

For a long time, you were afraid I'd hurt you like he did.

You worried every time I went out to eat with friends,

You panicked when I hung out with Clyde.

You must have vowed to yourself to do everything in your power to keep me.

You starved yourself to please me,

Because he told you you were fat and undesirable.

I heard you one afternoon after I'd come home from work early.

You were in the bathroom, muttering awful things to yourself.

Calling yourself things he must have called you.

Believing things that he must have made you believe.

I walked in, hugging you and telling you I loved you.

I meant it, I really did.

I told you to stop.

Because your stomach was shrinking too much.

And you looked starved,

And weak,

And miserable.

And all those things you thought you deserved.

I told you I didn't want you to hurt yourself anymore.

You asked to see with my eyes; to understand why I thought you were so damn great.

And I let you in, didn't I?

You came here with five cents to your name,

And nowhere to stay,

With bruises and cuts and burns,

Broken eyes,

A desire to please,

And a broken heart.

You came with baggage to weigh you down,

And dark circles under your eyes.

And I took it all away.

I made a home for you,

Healed your cuts,

Let you see through my eyes,

Let you please me,

And mended your heart together again.

But then he found us.

He came with red eyes,

Puffy from crying.

He said he loved you.

He said he wanted you,

And needed you,

And missed you,

And all those things he needed to say behind crossed fingers.

He kissed you,

And you melted into it.

You looked at me one last time,

And hugged me hard,

And thanked me for being there for you.

You said you loved me.

And since you had nothing more to give, you gave me the nickel that had been jammed in your pocket since the day I met you.

I'd let you in so many times.

That I'd no idea how I was supposed to release you.

If you love it let it go, you said.

I didn't want too.

I didn't think I could.

But I let you go, didn't I?

And so I'll sit here alone,

Waiting for the day you come back,

With another nickel to your name,

And nowhere to stay.

Begging and pleading.

And I'll let you in, won't I?


End file.
